Friday, July 05, 2013

Smell of ink

I've been a little MIA, sorry about that.
I have been dealing with panic attacks and reality checks
and striving to live in between it all.

I haven't had black tea in over a week, I have cut most of the things I need to from my diet.
I got a jump rope and did a little jogging the other day...
I don't run, I never have but always fantasied about it.
Sadly, my knees were made wrong for running and all it does is deteriorate my cartilage, I use to be a StairMaster maven, but when the crackling in my knees became too much the doc explained how my knees are built wrong for that much low impact to no impact is way better for the longevity of them. 
I convinced myself that if I was out walking why not try a little trotting, it was early morning and
no one would see me, as I was totally embarrassed that I would look like a total fool.
Just as I started to jog my next door neighbor turns the corner and sees me
trotting, huffing and I smile and jog past her.
I was mortified.
I have taken to just power walking again....
Then I got an email from a friend telling me of this great deal for yoga.
She was signing up and so was another friend...
so I fought all my interior voice that were screaming
" are you crazy!"
and signed up for a month of what turns out to be HOT yoga and "powercore" at that!
Humility will step aside once again...
while this lovely pear goes to yoga with the beautiful beanpoles.
I am also working away like a busy little Barreness.
I am printing up what has turned out to be a small storm, the house smells of ink and baby oil.
I am making progress and that seems to be lulling the panic as I can see the progress,
although there is still a lot to do before the window dressing on the 18th.
I have two friends that are willing to help with whatever I need last minute help with...
so thankful
In the meantime I am happy
I am given more restrictions and more pressure and I am smiling.
go figure


Mali said...

Glad you're smiling. That made me smile.

Wolfers said...

Motivation and energy always liven us up! I giggled when you described about yoga (hot- that is) and trotting. Keeping busy is always great! :) :)

nicole said...

glad to hear you are happy and smiling. I think being busy really brings a lot of energy. I always prefer it to not having much going on. xoxo.