I need to schedule this and that and I would like...this is my yearly physical after all.
I was far more prepared then her.
She asked if I had any pregnancies and I told her about my miscarrages. She said they were not real pregnancies, that real ones have a postive pee test. I sank...I am a fake.
She told me at this point of the game, I could have a referral to a fertility specialist or have a hysterectomy.
I told her that those were not options for me.
We chose many years ago to not have assistance to get pregnant.
She followed up this with, "...then now would also be a good time to start the adoption process"
I told her that was not an option either.
I got my blood taken, peed in a cup and have slips for future ultrasounds and mammograms.
I have found the end of the road.
there is just barreness ahead of me.......no sign "thank you for visiting" or a pretty patch of wildflowers.
Just the end of the known road.