Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Note to self...

The front of the postcard, charming, no?!

So I was in the garage today, making room for furniture that is bound to arrive by this weekend.
It is the only place that it will fit.
Furniture that is no doubt beautiful and old and too big to fit in our tiny home.
BUT I am still holding a candle for a "forever home" that will fit the chest and the dresser.
I was moving things, building a pile of items that will be picked up by the local thrift store this week before they unload more things into the tiny garage that we then get to deal with down the road.
Anyhooo... I was moving stuff and unearthed a box of old photos.
Among the treasures I exhumed was a postcard I sent myself.
Yep, I am that person....I send myself a postcard the last day of the journey telling myself how I was feeling at that moment or what I had learned.
It arrives days after me, and usually just as the "paradise is fading from my memory" and I am getting back to reality moment.
This postcard was sent to me, by me in 1997
I had gone (escaped)* to Europe for a few weeks, to find out how damaged I was.
The Barren and I were about 5years into our relationship and he was ready to settle down and I was flipping out....so I ran away to listen to my heart and get a little space....well a lot of space.
He endorsed this, and waited for me to figure shit out...it was really only a short period of time but enough to put things in line, ya know?! 
*Running away sounds to romantic, but really it was me on a $20 a day budget for food and housing and I was eating a lot of candy bars and staying in hostels that fed you breakfast so I could pocket bread or cereal for dinner.
I read this postcard again today with a smile on my face.
This is what it says:

Well- here I am and there you are- two way different places-but still one person. You can depend on yourself- and know how long and short time can be, hours, days, months. Feet are tired, ankles sore- emotionally exhausted. but-in a sense a bit afraid of getting into a groove-becoming set in my ways again. Remember movement-simple movement. walking barefoot-walking the dog-motion is what you need and know that returning can be just as good as coming- the swing is in your heart- you have the ability to come and go and don't let that be taken away.Continue to say what you feel. Be aware of what you need and tell him- don't back down as you wouldn't want him to do.and make art-your soul needs it. Send slides-invest in yourself and enjoy time. Don't wait for it to pass (as I am doing now) be loving-take another chance and give it. Know that you are a strong-confident woman-keep that damn smirk on your face. Keep them wondering.

I am so glad I sent myself this card....it is like a pocket mantra.


Wolfers said...

I like that too... I'm glad that you did that. :)

Mali said...

That's fantastic.

Jen said...

"and make art-your soul needs it."

Oh how timely!
It made me smile too. I never thought about sending myself a post card but it's such a great idea. This is fabulous ... and the front is pretty cool too.

nicole said...

Beautiful! I love the idea! It is a perfect pocket mantra as well.