Friday, September 23, 2011

Vacation all I ever wanted...

Firstly, thank you for your sweet and tender words of care.
Hubby mentioned that he wanted to do something this year to mark the loss.
So as the date gets closer, we are exploring meaningful acts that would work for us.

In the meantime...I have been buried in the studio and making art, and mailing submission after submission. The creative act is cathartic and essential for me but it has me thinking about a little break from everything!
It is not so easy, because of a little metal nut,(literally) that our cat ate earlier this year we have been "grounded" of sorts.

It was an expensive vet, ER, surgery and recovery thing that left us with little money.
I am very very thankful for the credit cards and the ability to take care of the cat, who is now happy and fat and playful. We are his people and it is our job to care for him after all.
I am sure many of you out there can relate, with cost from IF treatments

Summertime has past, and been a different one for us, well most of this year will be, so we are getting "creative" with our fun time.
We stay at home, watch movies via streaming every now and out on date night only (Friday's) and visit the bookstore, but don't buy anything. We have cut almost all extras out...My birthday was a potluck, Our anniversary will be a dinner at home most likely, Xmas will be handmade...
It is nice but doesn't stop our driving desire to get the HELL OUT OF DODGE
We are travelers, we are explorers...we are the people who take the long road home so we can find new things...but as much as I run numbers and theories thru my head, we don't have any money to do what we want to do most right now: travel.

****bitching about to begin ****
(you can skip down to my call out to the universe below)

We haven't had a break from all this "can't have a baby" stuff since it was started, 7 years ago!
Our honeymoon took two years of saving, and was our hope to make a baby, by relaxing and getting away (we went to eastern Europe in the winter)...but I was in so much pain, I was either asleep from vicodin or crying. (super romantic) and on return I was in the ER for an ovarian cyst that was about to explode.
SERIOUSLY when do we get a honeymoon ?!
A sweet relaxing, run on the beach (or assorted other lovely places) with the wind in our hair, laughing and smiling and eating lovely foods all while being naked and happy.

We had an extended weekend here and there, but we were either going to a funeral on the East coast, joining two families (5 kids) at a lake or driving for 10hours to meet family for 24hours then then driving back home to get to work. Those were our break aways.... 
***Bitching over***

Call out to the universe!!

I just want to put that out there universe, I think we need a break.
A good one too: not a "hey, here is a three day weekend" kind...or "we'll waive that $5 fee for you"
and my sisterhood needs one too!
All these ladies and gents have been pouring every ounce of love and hope out there and not catching a break. We are do-gooders and kind heart, we help others and clean up after ourselves, we hug strangers and offer kind words. We are the breathe of fresh air and why people are so glad to meet us, because " they are so nice"
Come on, there is a lot of crap out there right now, and a lot of crappy people are getting really big breaks...why not spread the good things to us:
the ones that SMILE thru pain
We have held up our you can do some work too!!

It is the Autumnal equinox..we are tucking the sun into bed, like a cocoon...
I hope this weekend will be the start of something better for us all!
hugs sisters


Nicole said...

Amen!!! I hear you on this. You definitely deserve a real, true good vacation after all of this. I really hope you get one soon! I can tell you, my real vacation to Brazil back in February put a lot of good things in motion for me. You deserve one too.

You are a wonderful cat owner for taking such good care of your little one!

I agree, you totally need a break. It is good to bitch about these things. It is good to get out these frustrations. Time to take care of you. Not just visit family, but have some luxury time for the two of you. I am sending good thoughts your way and I hope this might be the beginning of new good things!

CameronPoe2409 said...

You're call out to the universe speaks volumes to me! I sometimes feel that people travel blistfully through life while others struggle, it just doesn't seem fair. My fingers are crossed that the universe answers your call so that something no matter how small happens to make you smile. xxx

Kelly said...

I will echo your cry to the universe for do deserve a break! Praying for a positive answer for you soon!!! Blessings...ICLW #25

Kate said...

Hello and happy ICLW!

Hope you get the vacation of your dreams. There are lots of places to go in the world to just chill out. It may be a bit expensive to fly to places like Thailand but once you're there it isn't very expensive. It's more accessible than you think.

St Elsewhere said...

I really do hope you get some rest and also some lucky break. I realized from your previous posts that this time of the year also meant renewed remembrance of the miscarriages....there are some anniversaries that should not be there in our minds at all.

Please take care.

iclw #39

Sarah said...

keep sending out those vibes and hopefully something will come your way!!!

Happy ICLW

Kim said...

I do believe that Atlanta might be calling... hardly a trip to Nepal or the Czech Republic, but we do have peaches and sweet tea. Oh, and hugs. Lots of hugs.