My beloved furry sons are both sick, they both ingested the poisoned cat food. My week has been spent at Vet ER's, and clinics. Crying and trying to understand the tasks at hand...what we can do to save them. Anything to save them.
Pleading to whatever or whoever still listens to me, to save them.
I feel guilty for not having hope anymore....I question my purpose.
" There must be another purpose for you"; I am beginning to wonder if that is to experience sorrow. Deep, hollowing, sorrow.
A voice in the back of my head is telling me what people people are saying about me..." they are pets...why are you so disturbed ? " Invalidating my feelings and emotions.
They are more then pets, they are my children. I am fighting for them just as any other parent would.
My fear is that, I have nothing to draw from anymore; I am a shallow puddle.
The title The Barreness is more now...not just my body, but maybe my life too.