I think I made a terrible mistake tonight....I was out to dinner with hubby and was trying really hard to simply relax, as my lack of sleep this last week has left me running on empty.
I am thrilled to have the whole show ready for the gallery but the stress will escalate Sunday and all of next week...so tonight was a "break" a date and a little relaxing.
As we were leaving I saw a woman who I know thru other people and her hubby. She smiled and started a conversation, "are you ready for the show?" I said I was closer and happy to have it open this next week. She said that they were coming to the show as they are personally familiar with infertility too. I said " I had heard, us infertiles seem to know one another" at this I saw the look of confusion and a little shock, then they were told that their table was ready...it was awkward and we said good night quickly and left.
I felt horrible...I have spent the last two days talking almost nonstop to people from news papers and online magazines about my infertility and I guess my sense of social graces has dropped. I need to honor her and realize that she doesn't talk about her infertility or refer to herself in the same way.
We raced home and sent an apology to her:
"Dear sweet lady whom I just barely know,
I realized as we were walking away from our short and very sweet conversation that I might have hurt your feelings...I am sorry.
I should have said "I am sorry that we are in the same crappy sorority". I am sorry that you and your hubby have also not gotten the results you had hoped for.
I have been speaking a lot about my own struggles with infertility,
that I guess some of my filters have dropped and I did not mean to make you or your hubby feel uncomfortable or angry.
Please forgive my misstep in words or actions,
I do hope that you still come to see the show, as hopefully my work will speak better then I did for myself.
I have made a promise to myself that I will be
far far far better at being present and conscience in my words.
I hope she can forgive me...